17 Comments
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Jeanne Reynolds's avatar

I adore this. Words so kindred with my heart. Glad to find you. Best wishes xx

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Felicia A. Iyamu's avatar

Thank you. Bless you. Welcome! I feel so grateful it resonates <3

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Paul Dotta's avatar

What a list... first and second, I can confirm as absolutely true. Keep being yourself!💐

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Felicia A. Iyamu's avatar

✨✨🫂💛💛

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Mariele Klering's avatar

Oh my gosh Felicia, are you living in my head? You just described an experience so close to mine, especially the part about trying to fit in. That’s where the glass cracked for me: almost everyone is trying to fit in, so where does that even lead us? We’re all busy wondering how others see us, while they’re doing the same. It’s a never-ending loop. Thank you for sharing this. You’ve officially rented a room in my brain, in the best way possible.

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Felicia A. Iyamu's avatar

🥺 love this and thank you! yes, I think the more people who give others “permission” to just be themselves, the more of us who will have the “glass crack” (I like this phrase you use) and end up on the other side of the loop <3

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Anton's avatar

Your essay, What Happens When There's Nothing Left to Prove?, offers a profound meditation on the release of performative perfectionism. You eloquently explore the transition from striving for external validation to embracing authenticity, highlighting the freedom found in letting go of the need to constantly prove oneself. Your writing resonates deeply, inviting readers to reflect on their own journeys toward self-acceptance and genuine expression.

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Felicia A. Iyamu's avatar

I hope we can escape the validation matrix before it’s too late 🙏🍀

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Helena Solith's avatar

Totally feel this. As someone who used to be deep in people-pleasing, I know how real that need to fit in is. It’s such an early, survival-based instinct. So I have so much compassion for anyone who’s still in it or just starting to find their way out. And honestly, liberating from this need is one of the most powerful transformations we can go through.

I always say, people pleasers hold immense power in themselves. Because they know what it’s like to be caged, and what it takes to break free. And after that, they would never settle for anything less than full authenticity. Thank you for spreading the word. It’s so needed.

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Felicia A. Iyamu's avatar

Wow, yes - there's that too! People-pleasing. . .that is another big can of worms that is also inauthentic. Thank you so much for the thoughtful comment. I feel happy to receive it

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Tamy Faierman M.D.'s avatar

LOVE this , Felicia. Love the vibe, the personal shares, the wisdom gained, the healing perfectionism. Definitely resonate with all of it!

Great job expressing your truth and authenticity, Felicia, it's palpable. I'll be back for more. 🥰✨👌

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Felicia A. Iyamu's avatar

thank you so much. i feel grateful it resonates! thank you for the warm words and the engagement

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Tamy Faierman M.D.'s avatar

My pleasure, Felicia :)

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Allen Kwon's avatar

I love how gently but powerfully you dismantled the lie of performative perfectionism. Your voice carries so much clarity and heart

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Felicia A. Iyamu's avatar

Thank you so much. It means a lot to me this balance you point out <3 I feel so grateful it resonates.

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Beth Owen Canavan's avatar

Thank you, Felicia, for your words of grace this morning. You have wisdom beyond your years. Keep doing what you’re doing and being true to yourself because that is where the beauty lives. Sending love back.

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Felicia A. Iyamu's avatar

Thank you so much, Beth Ann. I appreciate the comment. It means a lot to me. I really enjoyed writing this one! Life is beautiful. It is all in the details ❤️ love you too

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